Michael Schiavo Wants to Die

It's true! He told me himself.

Yes, as I recall, it was many years ago, and I had been driving out in the desert and had just let off a hitchhiker (whom I later found out was none other than Howard Hughes, and he said he was going to leave me a portion of his fortune in his will. Or at least that was his intention. But that's a different story...)

Well anyway, it was a night for wills and intentions it seems, because right then I picked up ANOTHER hitchhiker who needed a ride, and now I realize it was none other than this Michael Schiavo guy!

And he starts telling me, you know, about just how much he loves his wife. Absolutely adores her!

And how if anything ever happened to her, well, he just loved her so much, that he couldn't possibly live without her, not for one minute!

Why, to even imagine such a thing would be too horrible and cruel to contemplate!

No, he said it clearly, he'd want to die if anything ever happened to take his sweet wife away from him.

And furthermore, here's the real kicker, he explained that the grief and agony over losing his wife would mostly likely drive him completely insane, and so anything he said after that we couldn't really trust.

He said he'd probably say at a time like that, that our meeting never happened and that he'd want to live -- but he assured me that we shouldn't believe it, because it would just be the grief talking, and would really be a cry for help, signalling that we should find a way to put him out of his misery.

So quick, get Judge Greer on the line!

Schedule an appointment with Dr. Kevorkian!